Annotated lyrics for The Hold Steady song 'Esther' - In the middle of a mission I met Esther in the kitchen / Drinking something blue. It looked like Windex. / She could shake but couldn't really sing. Sharpened like a feral thing. / Helped with my part when I lost interest. / She said her name was Esther. I said baby that sounds biblical. / Ain't she the one that came up after Vashti? / Yeah and then some other stuff. At some point there I fell in love. / Then she heard a song she liked and lost me. / The party ended suddenly / Suddenly it's over. / That left me and Esther / All alone and getting older. / All alone and getting getting older. / Smoking in the street. / Now everything is Esther. / It's been that way all week. / The times that we were powerless were times that I remember best. / When it first came on it felt just like a blanket. / Once we had a little bit we pretty much just wasted it. / Traded in our tickets for drinks and little trinkets. / That scene back in the city was the opposite of freedom. / We were always so damn broke. It was this whole dependent fallacy. / They started shooting. I sort of saw into the future. / And Esther always wants it how it used to be. / The songs all ran together and / The kids ran out of liquor. / That's when me and Esther / Started staring at each other. / Started staring at each other / Feeling pretty sweet. / Now everything is Esther. / It's been that way all week. / These parties fall to pieces. / The endings are so heavy. / Feels like no ones watching / When we're this deep in the valley. / When we're this deep in the valley / You can see so many stars. / When Esther told her story / We were sitting in her car. / She said her folks were never close. / They had me because they had to. / No one named me Esther / That came up a little later. / It was after some detective / Came around here with some questions. / I went out to Colorado. / I was mostly in the motels. / Started living pretty reckless. / Started calling myself Esther. / I just felt like someone different. / Felt like someone different. / And I never could forgive / All the movies in our heads / About the lives we wanna live. / The lives we wanna live / Are all free of pain and fear. / Now Esther's getting cigarettes / And me I'm buying beer. / Felt like someone different. / Felt like someone else. / She almost died in Denver. / She did it to herself. / She did it to herself. / There's only her to blame. / Of course I call her Esther. / I don't know her other name. / She's never going home. / Her folks were never close. / We mostly watch the tv. / Crack the windows when we smoke. / Her aura is amazing / But her room is kind of bleak. / I met Esther at a party / Been together for a week.